Meet the Parents

Have you ever seen the movie "Meet the Parents"??  The thought of the movie definitely makes me laugh remembering of all the crazy tricks Robert De Niro's character put his to-be son-in-law through.  Luckily when Gepher took me to meet his parents, his dad was not a former CIA, there were no lie dector tests, and the beloved pet didn't go missing.  Even though our visit was not a script from this movie, it was definitely filled with many hillarious moments worthy of any good movie.

Gepher is from the island of Mindanao.  This island is located south of Cebu.  Its a beautiful island filled with trees, rice fields, mountains, and of course the sea.  Its also an island that is not visited much by Americans.  Every day in the Philippines is an adventure.  I knew this trip would be no different, especially knowing that Gepher and I were going to stand out in the crowd as we made our way to his parent's home.

Gepher was a true gentleman before we ever left.  He wanted to make sure I was comfortable the entire trip.  We decided to fly there and take the boat back.  I insisted that whatever he decided would be fine with me because he knew best.  We booked our tickets and were ready to go!

We arrived at the airport in Cebu and boarded the propeller jet bound for Dipolog.  Our adventure had begun!  When we landed in Dipolog we walked across the tarmac and through the airport to find a "taxi" to take us to the city where we could catch the bus.  Immediately we were swarmed with every tricycle driver  wanting to take our bags and us wherever we wanted to go.  I'm pretty sure Gepher has never experienced service like that...but this is what happens when you are traveling with the American in a place where she is in the minority.  Did I mention this level of service comes with a price???  Well...let's just say my being with Gepher in the tricycle made the price much more than a normal tricycle ride.

As we arrive at the bus terminal, we begin looking around for the air conditioned bus his mother told us to take.  A gentleman approached us and told Gepher there are no buses going to Ipil (the place his parents live) and we will need to take an air conditioned van.  He looks at me and says, "What do you think we should do?”  I give the same answer I will come to give the entire trip, "You are the expert here so whatever you think is fine with me.”  In the back of my head I can't help but think, "we are about to be taken advantage of.  I mean we are at a bus terminal and he's telling us there are no buses."  That just doesn't make sense to me...but I am in the Philippines and things don't work like they do at home, so we'll just go with it.

We get to the van and I climb in next to the window with Gepher sitting next to me..  This van is by no means what I'd call air conditioned.  The vents were ripped out and it was obvious the air hadn't run in a long time.  The only air conditioning this van had was 4-60 (4 windows rolled down going 60 miles per hour).  The gentleman selling tickets for the van is the same man who told us there were no buses.  I immediately look at Gepher and say "we just got bamboozled"!  He just smiled and said, "I think you may be right"!  As we wait for the van to fill up so we can leave, I think to myself this is going to be an interesting 3.5 hour ride.

An older gentleman comes to the van and climbs in the driver's seat.  His hair is everywhere; he's wearing really thick glasses and looks as if he just got out of bed.  He says something that I cannot understand.  Gepher whispers to me that he just said he was going to “test the accelerator”.  We both begin thinking why are you testing the accelerator and is this truly a good idea???  The van is finally full and we take off.  And for those of you wondering, the old man who was going to test the accelerator is our driver.  (I guess he figured he would test it while driving with a van full of passengers.)

We begin driving down the road and there is a little boy and his mother sitting behind us.  I begin to notice she is quickly rummaging through her purse.  And then I heard a noise. I knew exactly what it was…the little boy was getting sick and throwing up in a bag directly behind Gepher’s head.  It’s all I can do to keep it together.  I focus on looking out the window and trying to ignore what was happening just to make sure I wasn’t next!  The van stops and the mom and child get out. Thank goodness!!

We continue down the road to the half way mark of the trip.  The van stops at another bus terminal to drop off and pick up passengers.  Every street vendor within a 5 block radius begin coming over to our van.  I notice they aren’t trying to sell us anything but instead just looking in.  I knew immediately we were drawing a crowd!  They were amazed by my blue eyes, curly hair, and my being with Gepher.  The kept asking how we were related.  In order to keep the questions at a minimum Gepher told them we were married.  When he told me what he had told them, I couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of our “wedding” happening on this crazy van ride!!

We finally pull out of the bus stop and head on down the road.  We stop along the way and pick up two passengers.  When we stop I look towards the back of the van and notice it is completely full.  I’m wondering where these two people are going to sit.  Well when they get in my question is quickly answered.  They sit next to Gepher and Gepher is now almost in my lap.  And the best part is these passengers must have been the town drunks and bathed in nothing but Jack Daniel’s.  They smelled like a terrible brewery and the more the talked the louder they got.

After a few more miles, the two town drunks got out and another man got in.  By this point it is raining.  The smell of dead fish begins to permeate the van.  I assume its coming from the sea outside.  With the rain blowing in and the smell of fish in the air, I decide to close the window.  All of a sudden I feel an elbow in my ribs.  That elbow is Gepher’s and he’s telling me to open the window back.  I tell him it smells out there and I’m getting wet.  With a straight face he tells me the smell is coming from the van!  The last man that got on brought his freshly caught dinner with him on a hook!!  I quickly opened up the window and bit my tongue not to laugh or draw any more attention to us.

After 5 hours, we finally make it to Ipil!!  I was never so glad to see two people I’d never met in all my life.  Talk about one crazy way to start our trip.  We climb in his parent’s van and I immediately felt welcomed.  It didn’t matter that my hair was curly and eyes were blue.  They welcomed me into their family for just who I was.  Their excitement for us was evident.

We spent the first night at the school where his mother is an English professor.  The next morning we explored the campus.  Gepher, JR (his 8 year old brother), and I hiked back to the school’s water falls.  His little brother was very quiet with me around; however, he did not want to miss anything with his big brother.  The waterfall was absolutely gorgeous sitting back amongst all the trees.  It was totally peaceful.


We left the school heading for his aunt’s house, where we were going to stay.  His mother was so excited to introduce me to every family member she could think of.  We stopped at the rice farm to meet family, met family we passed along the street, and even visited family in the hospital. I guess you can tell it was more than “meet the parents”.  It was more like “meet the clan”.  By the time we reached his aunt’s house, it was lunch time.  His mother and aunt were so sweet as they wanted to make sure they had foods I liked.  They asked would I be willing to cook spaghetti for the family for lunch.  So Gepher and I got in the kitchen together and cooked American spaghetti.  American spaghetti is very different from Filipino spaghetti; however, everyone enjoyed it.  JR had it all over his face so I’m pretty sure that said it all.

That night we had dinner at his parent’s house.  His sister had cooked up quite the feast for everyone.  Then it was picture time.  We had pictures made with everyone and everyone was laughing and having a great time.  Gepher later told me that he can only remember two other times in his life when they made pictures as a family.  I guess my coming was quite an event in the Lopina family.

The next morning his parents arrive to pick us up and take us to meet his grandparents.  We walk out to get in the van and to our surprise it will not start.  Mr. Lopina asks Gepher and JR to help him push it back and forth and back and forth to get it started.  In the back of my mind, I’m thinking is this really going to work?  All of a sudden Mr. Lopina asks me to come over and says “you know how to drive, right?”  I tell him of course and he asks me to climb in and start the car as they are pushing it back and forth and back and forth.  Well the family van is a manual and all I can drive is an automatice.  I ask him, “I’m suppose to push the clutch in when I try to start it, right?”  Immediately his dad has a look on his face as if to say I thought you knew how to drive.  You can tell he doesn’t think this is a good idea but he has to go with it now that he’s asked me.  They begin to push the car and I begin to start it; however, Gepher yells and says not now!  I’m thinking to myself, “you told me to start it when you push the car and you are pushing it so I thought I was to start it.”  They quickly decide I obviously don’t know the Filipino way of jumping a car off so I get out and JR (the 8 year old) gets into the driver’s seat.  His mother and I are sitting off to the side just laughing at the entire situation as the 3 Lopina men attempt to start the car.  As Gepher and his dad continue pushing the car back and forth, JR is able to get it started!!  I guess I’m not as smart as an 8 year old after all.

That day we had a lovely time playing with the kids in the front yard, playing cards, and just enjoying getting to know everyone better.  His sisters were planning dinner.  Everyone wanted to make sure they were cooking foods I liked.  They knew that American’s eat potatoes almost as much as Filipinos eat rice.  So because of this, they decided they needed to go to the market to get potatoes.  They asked Gepher and I to go along so we did.  (Don’t worry the car started this trip.)  We head to the market but to our surprise when we arrived they would not let us get out of the car.  So instead we sat in the car.  We both just laughed!!  We thought it was pretty funny that they asked us to go to the market but we never really went to the market.  We only got to see the market.  In the end we got the potatoes and I cooked mashed potatoes for everyone to go along with the fabulous dinner his sisters fixed.

The next morning his parents came to pick us up.  They were taking us to the bus terminal to head back to Cebu.  We climb in the car only for it not to start again!  This time as I’m sitting with his mom she is quickly telling his dad that it’s not funny this time.  I couldn’t help but laugh to myself as I thought this was the perfect way to end a crazy adventure.  We decide it best for us to just take a tricycle back to the bus terminal since the van won’t start.  So we climb into the tricycle and just as Gepher is getting in he notices it has a flat tire.  We climb back out and they get the van started; however, it too has a flat tire.  With all the craziness, his parents have decided they will just drive us to Dipolog to catch the boat.  We get the tire fixed and stop at his uncle’s house to see if they might have a spare.  They do not have a spare; therefore, his parents taking us to Dipolog is no longer an option.

His uncle offers for us to stay the night at his house and we can catch the bus in the morning.  Gepher asks what I’d like to do.  I tell him my infamous answer.  He walks up to the street and begins looking down the road.  I realize he’s watching for the bus.  The bus begins to approach and he franticly flags it down.  I grab our things and chase after him and the bus.  We climb on the bus and our only good bye is a wave from the window.
The trip back to Diplog was very uneventful and easy.  We make it back and head to the port to catch the boat.  Gepher thinks there is a 4:00 and 7:00 boat.  As we reach the port at 4:15 we see the boat sailing off in the distance.  To our surprise not only did we miss the boat but it’s the only one for the night!!  Looks like we are either spending the night in Dipolog or swimming back to Cebu.  We chose the first option and found a nice Inn to spend the night.  The ladies at the Inn were also very curious about us so we stuck with our story...we are married.  If she only knew we got married on the "van".

The next morning we made our way back to the pier bright and early.  Since we weren’t sure when the boat left we figured we’d rather be safe than sorry.  As we arrive, the security guard tells us the boat will not leave until noon.  We decide to just wait and walk into the terminal.  There is a boat parked at the pier and I ask Gepher where that boat is going.  He isn’t sure so he asks the gentleman mopping the floors of the terminal.  The gentleman tells us the boat is heading for Cebu and for us to hurry and get on it.  So he unlocks the door.  (The lock was a piece of rope wound around the doors.)  We run out of the terminal and onto the boat.  The boat begins to sail off and I look at Gepher and say, “we just took travel advice from the janitor and never once asked anyone on this boat where its going.”  We both laugh at the thought we could end up anywhere in the Philippines and we don’t even have a ticket for it.  Luckily they announce over the intercom that the boat is going to Cebu and we bought our tickets on board.  We finally made it back to Cebu.

To say meeting his parents for the first time was memorable is an understatement.  I’m not sure if the van ride or the car not starting or missing the boat was more memorable.  I do know that the warmth, love, and acceptance I felt was something I will never forget. 

Gepher has a wonderful family and I am blessed to become a part of it.  If this is any indication as to how our life will be together...I'm sure we are in for one BIG ADVENTURE!

Carnival in a Suitcase

I bet you didn't know that everything you need for a children's Carnival can fit in a suitcase.  You are probably thinking there is no way an entire Carnival will fit in one suitcase.  But in fact it will.  Let me tell you just how much joy and fun this one suitcase brought to children across Cebu.

One Saturday afternoon I ran into the party store to get a gift I had seen earlier for my niece.  I knew exactly where it was and I thought this would be a super quick errand.  Boy was I wrong.  When I got into the store everything had been rearranged from the last time I had shopped there.  As I walked up and down every aisle looking for the sock monkey, I came across the "Carnival Party" aisle.  Seeing the games and prizes I instantly thought it would be so much fun to do a Bible themed carnival for the kids of Naga.  Standing in the store, I decided every game could have a Bible theme and the children could win small prizes and candy at each booth.  We could tell a Bible story before the carnival and sing fun songs.  The longer I stood in that aisle the more fun I thought this carnival was going to be and the more anixous I got to tell Gepher my big idea!!

That night I could hardly contain my excitement as I talked with Gepher online.  I told him we could play "Jonah and Whale Ring Toss" and "Pin the Nose on Noah's Lions" and "David's Slingshot" and many others.  That night I did most of the talking and he did more listening.  At the end he asked, so what's a carnival exactly?  He was in for a BIG SURPRISE as I began explaining more.   





When I landed in Cebu I could hardly wait to unpack all the games, supplies, and prizes for Gepher to finally see what was in store for the kids of Naga.  I don't think it was until this moment that he got it.  We had a total of 10 games each with a Bible theme.  The games ranged in difficulty level and all had a Bible theme.  We had "Fisher's of Men Fishing Pond", "Moses's Snake Pit", "Pin the Nose on Noah's Lions", "Jericho Walls Come Down", "Creation Bulls Eye", "David's Slingshot", and a few others.  We had over 1000 prizes that the children could win at each booth.  The children would either win a prize or a piece of candy.  The two of us got more excited as we talked.  We tried the games out played them as if we were 6 years old.  It wasn't until this moment that Gepher realized my "crazy idea" was bigger and more work than he imagined.  (I think at this moment he had wished he asked more questions.) 

On the day of the carnival we had a team of 20 teenagers and young people to help us set up and run the games.  The sun was shinning and the temperatures were rising but nothing was going to stop the fun.  Gepher and the Naga ministers had gone out inviting all the children from both church and the surrounding neighborhood a couple weeks earlier.  We planned for 80 kids.  After a quick explanation of each game to the team we made our way to the Elementary school yard to set up for the event.

When we arrived at the location the real work began.  Before we could set up each of the booths, the ground needed to be cleared of all the trash and weeds.  It was important that it was a safe area for the kids to enjoy and play.  As we began sitting up the games, the children came from all over the neighborhood.  We had children coming from all directions.  Some came alone and others came with their parents.  Everyone was running, laughing, and patiently awaiting what was about to happen.  Shelou and Crystal were great at getting every child a name tag while several of the boys served as crowd control.  It wasn't long that we ran out of the 100 name tags we have brought.  We ended up with 120 kids (and for those of you who may have forgotten we only planned for 80).

The afternoon began with singing under the tree.  Filipino children love to sing...especially the animated songs.  Listening to these kids praise God and watching their expressions was simply awesome.  Gepher told the story of David and Goliath.  He is an amazing story teller.  He captivated the audience through the flannel and different voices for each of the characters.  The children (and adults) were so quiet you could have heard a pin drop (and remember we were outside with LOTS of distractions).  The children hung on every word he said, anxiously awaiting to hear if David would kill Goliath.  As I stood back looking at the children and seeing the mother's faces as they listened to the story, I realized that some of these children (and parents) were hearing a Bible story for the first time.  That moment made carrying the suitcase from the otherside of the world worth the effort.

As the children said "AMEN" we followed the prayer with the moment everyone had been waiting for.   Let the Games Begin!!  The children had the look of Christmas morning on their faces.  It was as if Santa had brought a gift they had never seen but couldn't wait to begin playing with and discovering everything about it.  The smiles and sounds of children's laughter filled the neighborhood.  They could have been heard from miles away. 

Every child had the chance to play every game once.  And they loved every minute of it.  They couldn't wait to see what number fish they caught at the "Fisher's of Men Fishing Pond" with Earlie and Mom.  They wanted to kock down Goliath with Fred at "David's Slingshot".  They wanted to nail the bulls eye at "Creation's Bulls Eye".  I'm not sure if they had more fun knocking the pins down or watching Clark and Shelou set them up at "Jericho's Walls". The children loved playing every game and no one wanted to see the fun end.

Following the events of the day, each child received a snack of a sandwich, chips, cookie, and drink (which they shared with a friend due to the crowd multiplying).  We not only wanted to feed the soul of the kids but also their little bodies.  The laughter was quickly replaced with "YUMS" and showing their friends and parents all the neat goodies they won.

One little girl told me it was the "best day of my whole life".  WOW, I couldn't believe that God used me to bring this little girl her best day ever.  God also used that little girl to put things back into perspective for me.  He reminded me that Jesus loves the children and when we do for the least of these we do for Him.  

Our carnvial was such a success we couldn't stop with just one.  We went on to have the same event in two other parts of Cebu, Danao and Minglanilla.  Each of these were just as special and exciting.  In all we had about 300 kids come through the carnival, hear one Bible story (maybe for the first time), and experience the love of Jesus.

After all 3 Carnvials Gepher told me that my idea might have been "crazy" but one that will become a tradition in children's ministry across Cebu.  I can't wait to see what next year's Carnival has in store!!

Prayer Changes Things

"Prayer Changes Things" is what the plaque says hanging in my family room.  I've read it many times laying on the couch but it wasn't until this past year that I realized the truth in this simple saying.  If you don't believe these three simple words now, you hopefully will after hearing just how powerful prayer and God have been as our Love Story has unfolded.

For years I have prayed that God would give me a husband and a partner in life.  Someone that could serve in His kingdom with me.  Someone that would be a great father (someday).  Someone that would love me unconditionally.  Someone that would be my best friend.  As my friends began to get married I asked God many times why not me?  Where was the man he had chosen as my mate?  But God reminded me His timetable isn't aligned with ours. 

Mom and Dad have been very active in the ministry in Cebu over the last seven years.  Mom is always so excited to tell us the latest happenings, successes, and church plants.  The Naga church plant was no different.  Naga was the latest church plant and Mom was so excited one morning as we spoke about the work Gepher was doing.  Every Saturday children from all over Naga (about 70 to 80) were coming to hear the story of Jesus under a Mango tree.  That story touched my heart and I knew immediately I wanted to help.  I asked Mom what kind of "stuff" did Gepher have to teach the kids.  She said only the material she had received from Southside (our home congregation).  It was back to school time and school supplies were on sale.  I immediately told her I was going to go out shopping for crayons, glue, scissors, etc and bring when I came on my vacation.  I went out shopping that day and filled the cart full of fun supplies that I just knew would bring smiles to the kids faces.  I didn't know then just how important those crayons would be in the rest of my life.

Since I had never met Gepher, I just wanted Mom to deliver the package.  Of course she wouldn't (but who knows where we would be if she had).  Wednesday morning after devotional Mom and I walked downstairs to where the boys were.  I gave Gepher the bag of crayons and he was speechless.  He couldn't believe I would want to make a difference in the kids lives.  I never really thought of it that way.  The kids needed the supplies and I had them to give.  At that moment Gepher says he knew there was something special about me.

After returning home from a wonderful vacation, I found a Thank You note in my email from Gepher.  I was surprised to find this note and thought "he's on Mom and Dad's ministry team, I need to respond and be nice".  An occasional email turned into an often email and even online chatting.  I couldn't believe what was happening.  I was building a friendship with someone I had only met once.  How could this be???  We talked about life, dreams, goals, prayers.  And the more we talked the more we looked forward to the next interaction...until Gepher finally told me just how he felt.  I was shocked, speechless.  I immediately prayed and said "God can this be true???  There is no way this can happen.  He's on the other side of the world."  I told God if this was suppose to be then he needed to make it obvious and open doors for us.

Driving to work one day I heard God speak in a way I'd never experienced before.  He told me to "step out in faith and see" as I was listening a CD in the car.  I couldn't get that out of my head.  The more time we spent together the more I prayed and the more God told me, "I'm giving you what you've asked for."  My boss came to me later that week and indicated we were moving my business to Cebu and would I be willing to lead the operation there for 6 months.  I couldn't believe this was happening...God was working in ways I never expected.  He was opening doors for us to be in the same place.  Prayers were being answered.

In April I traveled to Manila for business.  Gepher and I were so excited for this trip as it was going to be the first time we actually got to spend time together.  We had arranged the perfect afternoon...coffee, movie, and dinner.  We were going to meet after church at the mall.  Like all girl's I had found the perfect outfit.  But something after church told me I needed to go home and change.  So I did.  I went home and put on blue jeans and a cute top.  We met and had the perfect afternoon.  It wasn't the akward first date and he was the perfect gentleman.

As I got ready to head back to the US, Gepher and I spent one night talking about us.  We both felt things were perfect while together.  He shared something with me one night that took my breath away.  He told me he had been praying for us.  He had actually done more than just prayed but asked God for a sign.  He had put the story of Abraham finding Isaac a wife into practice.  He put names in a cup and prayed over them for a week and when he "cast lots" he drew mine.  Talk about giving a girl chill bumps.  As if that wasn't enough, he pulled a piece of paper from his wallet.  It was a prayer he had written out.  A prayer that stated when we met on our first date if I was the one I'd be wearing blue.  And in case you forgot, I went home after church and changed clothes and put on blue.  Prayers Answered.

Upon arriving back home our time together online became more important.  It was a chance to reconnect, build our friendship, pray together, and just continue to get to know one another.  We weren't sure how this was all going to work, but we knew with God in charge He obviously had a plan.  We both longed for the time I could travel back to Cebu to spend more time together.  At that time we didn't know it would be just a few weeks later.

Meredith was traveling for her summer vacation in June and I was so jealous she was going and I was staying behind.  My boss and I talked one day and she asked about Meredith.  I told her that Meredith was getting ready to head to the Philippines and she was disappointed I didn't get to go with her this year.  My boss quickly said I could go and just work from there.  I couldn't believe it and immediately I knew I wanted to go.  We got online and found a rewards ticket on Friday night and flew out on Sunday.  Who would have thought you could do that! 

That trip we savored every moment together.  We enjoyed spending time together and ministering to the people of Naga.  He and I taught the kids on Sunday morning and it was as if we had always taught together.  The kids loved it and looked forward to our teaching together and the fun things we'd do in Bible class.  Those were sweet special memories.

As we fast forward time, I flew back to Cebu in August for work and vacation.  We enjoyed hanging out, planning the carnival (that'll be a post in the future), meeting the family, and just being together.  Our time together flew by too fast. 

At this point we both realized that God had given us what we had asked for, it just came in a package we didn't expect.  When he asked me to marry him I couldn't imagine answering anything but YES!! 

Our journey has been written on prayer and God.  Its a colorful adventure that He has written and we are enjoying every twist and turn.  He has provided ways for us to be together and minister in Cebu both in the short term and after we get married.

I guess by now you can say I have a new saying.  Its not "Prayer Changes Things" but instead its "Be Careful What You Pray for Because You Might Just Get It."  We can't wait to see what God has in store for us and share with our friends and family as we start our journey together as husband and wife.